Give me vision

So, it’s Tuesday. It is Week 5 of lectures. WEEK 5 FOLKS. That means I’ve been here just over a month. I’m not going to lie, it feels like much longer than that. Things have definitely happened in this past month for me. First off, I moved to Australia! I experienced my first cyclone, which is crazy! My boy Evan has doubled his birth weight! (almost) I have learned the enjoyment of prayer. Training has begun (hardcore) for our trip to Papua New Guinea. I have been pushed down, picked back up, defeated and confused. I have relied on strength that does not come from myself, and I have dealt with issues I didn’t even know I had. I have been challenged, encouraged, blessed and filled with the glory of my Maker. And this is only the beginning. Exciting, isn’t it? 🙂

This week we have a guest speaker from Kona, Hawaii! Exotic much? Ha, but seriously. It’s Tuesday, we’ve only had 2 lectures with this man, and already I have gone from pumped about the week, to confused about where I stand in my understand with God, to now, where I am at peace with my Father. We have been challenged, to say the least. Monday, Kevin pumped us up in our relationship with God and what power He holds. Think about sin. How often do we look at sin in a negative light? We hate sin, because it pushes us so far from God. Yet, what it all comes down to is that we actually love sin. Confused? That was me. But then I started thinking about it. If something causes you pain, you run from it right? If something scares you, you avoid it. Yet sin causes us fright AND pain, and we don’t run from it. An alcoholic experiences HUGE pain from their choices, yet they still choose the drink. We love sin. I don’t know about you, but that just about made me sick. So how do you deal with that sin? Do you constantly focus on fixing it? Attend meetings, pray harder to rid yourself of it, get angry at yourself because of it, put yourself on church discipline? Good idea, let’s turn our attention off of God, and focus on our sin. Sounds like a wonderful plan. Maybe not. Honestly, something I’ve found to be true is that when you want to forget about one thing, overwhelm yourself with something else. And that’s the key. If you want to loosen the grip that sin has on your heart, fall deeper in love with Jesus. Love trumps sin. All the time. If someone gave you a choice, would you chose love, or sin? Good stuff, right? Monday was a good day. I took another step closer to my Father on Monday.

Tuesday. Oh Tuesday. Where do I start? Who is God to you? I’m not asking who do you think God is, but He has many qualities, and many positions to fill. We talked a lot about this. God is Creator, Saviour/Judge, Master/Lord, Father, Friend, and finally, He is our Husband. The Bible is constantly talking about how Jesus wanted His followers to take the next step in their relationship with Him, to keep digging deeper into Him. John 15:12-15 talks about how Jesus no longer calls us slaves, because He confides in us. Masters do not confide in their slaves. Friends confide in each other. Jesus encouraged us to jump away from being the slave, and to jump into relationship with Him. How lovely, right? We are Jesus’ friends. We are also Jesus’ bride, but that’s a hard one to convey to you guys through a blog, so I’ll leave that until June.

Flip the switch. Kevin is no longer talking about relationship with Christ. He jumps into common assumptions we make about God and who He is. Let’s rewind a bit. Last year, a friend of mine was on YWAM in Australia as well. I remember the conversation we had because it intrigued me. I asked him how his experience had been in general, and  he said all the good things a man of God would. Then he shook me a bit and told me to be prepared. “Sam, you’re going to learn things that are opposite to what you’ve been taught your entire life. Being able to look these things through and find the truth in them is hard. What’s even harder is admitting you have been wrong for a long time.” Now, I’m not saying he was encouraging me to believe everything I am told, that would be foolish. But I have to look them through. I have to look at both sides of the story, and talk to God about them. All this time I’ve been waiting for these things to be presented to me, and they haven’t come. We’ve dealt with everything under the sun, and I’ve been fine. So I swept that under the rug. Cool, I’m alright, I don’t need to rearrange my thinking. BAM! Bring on Tuesday. Kevin started throwing assumptions at us from all over the church. Things about God and time, the control that God has in our lives, the plans God has, and how we mess them up. These are things that I thought I figured out. These are things I grew up with, beliefs that are Biblical, but then again, almost anything is Biblical if we want it to be. To say I wasn’t frustrated would be a big fat lie. How can these things be assumptions? They’re truths, aren’t they?

I have kitchen work duty right after lunch. We clean the kitchen. Anyone who knows me well knows that when I am angry, I clean, so today that was perfect. I watched my friends get so frustrated with the lectures. “Does he actually believe these things”, “I have proof from the Bible, this verse says this…” “I’m not saying he’s wrong, but don’t belittle my God.” And believe me, I was frustrated as well. But do you know what I saw when this was happening? I saw warriors of God rising up. We got so heated and angry, ready to defend our Saviour, it was infectious. Whatever Kevin’s intentions were for this lecture, they still rub off on us. Even now, 3 hours later, there is a group of girls sitting behind me trying to figure it out. Oh man. This was Tuesday. I’m almost concerned for Wednesday! 😛

Oh, and just so you know, we have started climbing Castle Hill twice daily now. We get Wednesday’s off, so that’s relieving, and definitely needed. We leave for camping on Saturday, so we are driving up to Hidden Valley. It’s about 2 hours away from here in Townsville, and we’ll be gone for 2 weeks! I come back on Sunday, March 6. So you won’t be hearing from me during that time, but rest assured knowing I’m hiking to waterfalls, encountering God, and making great friendships.

With Strength that is not my own, Sam